An Atheist In Church Clothing; Baptised With No Heavenly Afterglow

In every relationship there will be compromise and there will be disagreements. Now before everyone gets all judgmental on me, just remember I’ve managed to keep a healthy relationship very well in tact nearly fight free for the past eight years. Of course there were several times when we almost called it quits because, well, we’re young and are we making the right choice by staying together? There were times when we had to ask ourselves: Do we stay together out of love and passion or is it out of sheer comfort and convenience? Or maybe it’s all of the above. However time and again it has proven that what we share can not be replaced and that why would we give up a beautiful, safe and blissful relationship because we think there is something better out there? When we know that the basis of any of our future relationships will always, always, always be compared to our first great love.

That being said I’m not a stubborn person, nor a close minded person and I am most certainly not a push over. But when Jimmy asked me if I would get baptized I looked at him and realized that this meant something to him to know that my soul would be “safe”. It wasn’t him trying to change my ways or push me into something I wasn’t comfortable with and would love me any less if I chose not to through with it. After careful consideration I chose to get baptized – but on my own terms. I did not go through the Greek church where they wanted me to meet once a month with the priest, change my name for the church, go every Sunday in a dress and pretend to be someone that I am not. I wouldn’t be able to lie to myself and to the church for that matter. I went with the United Church. Basically, they’re as close to Atheisism (is that even a word?) as I’m going to get with out being out-ed to people who don’t know about my lack of faith. They believe in Gay marriage, they don’t ask all of the crazy premarital questions and they don’t even request that you be a member of the church in order to be baptized. Now, that kind of thinking I can deal with.

So, on March 16th, 2008 (Palm Sunday) seventy or so people bore witness to an Atheist being baptized and accepting Jesus into her heart. There was even a lady taking pictures of my baptism. Now I don’t know about you…but that’s really weird. I mean, really? I don’t want some random stranger to have a picture of me being purified by holy water. . When I do something I like to make sure I have support. So I rolled in there with many guests in toe; my two aunts, my mom, Jimmy, Jimmy’s parents and good old supportive Loni (who also brought a camera…but she is neither a stranger nor creepy so it was allowed).
A few of my friends begged me to scream and flail when the water hit me but I opted to remain a mature, morally sound adult. Well, at least until the minister said “Oh, I got you a little wet.” Now…maybe I’m just a tad immature but come on, when a minister says something moderately suggestive like that I had to suppress a smirk and a giggle. It was a lucky day that I did not wear a white shirt. He in fact did get me quite soaked; so much in fact that there was barely enough water to finish baptizing the other guy. I also Heard several people laugh (at my expense no less) by the third splash to the face. He had successfully, ruined my hair (the sun), my make up (the father) and shirt (and the Holy Spirit).
Anyway, it’s over now and I don’t feel any different. There was no heavenly glow, the visions and certainly no lighting to strike me down. I was a tad disappointed. Oh well, what can ya do? I guess now I just have to wait until my time is up to know if it worked or not but for the time being I know that at the very least, it was worth it.