Electrical Dysfunction PT3: Game Over

I am going to let you all in on a little nerdy secret of mine…I might have a slight-nothing to-be-concerned-about addiction to Computer RPG’s (Role Playing Games). For six years I played “The Sims”. And by addiction I mean I pre-ordered every expansion pack (SIMS 1 & 2) and booked the day off from work to be home for my Purolator delivery on release days. Then I would proceed to play for 14+ hours until my eyes were blood shot and I could no longer stay awake. I recall Jimmy coming home from work on those days to stand in the doorway of the computer room to find that his prize of a woman who hadn’t so much as blinked in the last 6 hours. He would say something to the effect of “Wow. Did you even shower today?” I would then tear my glazed eyes away from my miniature world to look at him and say “Oh, when did you get home?”

Thankfully, it was never the same delivery driver each time – that would have just been embarrassing. However, sometimes the driver would be slightly later than usual so I would get restless and start pacing or do things that normal people would do on their day off. One particular instance when I was in the shower I heard the buzzer ring. I leapt out of the shower in excitement, tossed on clothes and ran to the door to answer (still dripping water from my hair and tracking wet foot prints on the carpet). I hadn’t realized how odd my appearance would look until I got a weird creepy smirk from the driver. I quickly signed and slammed the door in his face so I could tear open my highly anticipated game.

Then one day it all went south. (What does that even mean?) While pacing up and down my apartment waiting for my game (I held off on the shower this time to avoid any further awkwardness and/or suggestive situations between myself and the driver) I began to worry. It was already after 3 pm and usually the game was delivered by 11 am. Something was wrong. I went downstairs to the lobby to check for any “Sorry we missed you” notes – that would have been full of blatant lies because I am always home for a game delivery! By 9 pm I had given up hope. I slumped down on the couch and admitted defeat. Well, tomorrow it will be here for sure. But tomorrow never came….

I checked the Purolator tracking site. Apparently one P. Rourke in Kentucky, IL had signed for my package the day I was pacing in my apartment. Ummm what? Frown. I looked closer at the tracking for my package. Somehow it went from Toronto, ON to Winnipeg, MB back to Toronto, ON and then on an airplane to KENTUCKY?! I called EA Games to point out this glaring error and they informed me to contact Purolator. Purolator said that I owed them $20 in fuel surcharges to send a package via airmail. My frown deepened. I carefully explain that I was supposed to be the recipient and not the sender and that there was clearly a mistake on their behalf. They so helpfully told me to contact EA Games and issued me a bill for a $20 fuel charge. So $25.99 for the game that P. Rourke was now enjoying and an additional $20 fuel charge for a game that was suppose to be mine but is not….fantastic.

That was the day I quit SIMS cold turkey. I have since taken up other Computer RPG games that require far less days off and not Purolator/EA involvement.

P.S. Who accepts a package from another country that you are not expecting from an unknown sender via airmail?